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Monday, December 22, 2003

100 OTHER things about me

Really you ought to also check out the original 100+ Things About Me; those are, I think, more interesting than these, on the whole. I tried hard as I was doing these not to duplicate any of the original ones.

1. My eyes are light brown, with darker brown flecks in them like freckles.
2. I am 5'8 1/2" tall. I reached this height in the eighth grade. This was not as much fun as it may sound.
3. I have lost 25 pounds in the past four months, on my way to a total loss goal of 44 lb.
4. I have spider veins in my legs.
5. I was born at 12:15 a.m.
6. I am far, far more in love with my husband now than I was on my honeymoon (and that's saying a lot).
7. My favorite classical composer is Mozart, but my favorite era of music is baroque.
8. I have one older brother. I always wanted younger siblings but never got any.
9. I had a very happy home life growing up. We never had a lot of money, but we had enough love and good times to make up for the unhappy time I had outside of my home.
10. I was book-smart but socially inept as a child.
11. Most of the time I still think I'm socially inept and I frequently try to get out of going places where I'll be around people who know me, but not very well (e.g. Bible study meetings, sometimes the grocery store, that kind of thing). I always think people will discuss how idiotic I am after I leave. I am most comfortable around my own family, or around total strangers.
12. I talk too much. I am always mentally kicking myself and telling myself to shut up.
13. Some people say I talk too fast, but I think most people talk too slowly. Sometimes I think they do it just ... to ... bug ... me.
14. As my dad would say (and has said!), I would lose my head if it weren't bolted on. It is like a disease with me; I set something down and lose it instantly; it takes me half an hour to find it again.
15. I have never been in an airplane. I had a five-minute flight in a helicopter once, though.
16. For a long time, I swore I would never have an online diary/weblog/journal. oops.
17. I wiggle my feet in a specific rhythmic way when I'm going to sleep. It's like a comfort mechanism; I've done it as long as I can remember. If I notice I'm doing it, I stop, but as soon as I stop thinking about it and start drifting off to sleep, it starts up again.
18. I have never had a surprise party, although I've thrown them for other people.
19. Whenever I watch an orchestra perform I get this jealous kind of feeling. I want to be down there playing, not up here watching. It doesn't last, though.
20. I can't draw, except I can make a passable-looking horse if I try really hard and erase a lot. Beyond that it's strictly stick figures. I can't even make a straight line or an even circle.
21. I make a mean pecan pie, though.
22. I grew up in the 80's but a lot of the pop culture references (like the cartoon-related ones) go right over my head, because we didn't watch a lot of TV.
23. In a similar vein, I have never watched even a single episode of a "reality TV" show, and frankly I think the idea sounds way over-hyped.
24. I also didn't watch any coverage about the OJ Simpson trial. I would have made a perfect juror in that case. When he was arrested, I heard about it on the radio and turned to my husband and said, "Who's OJ Simpson? Didn't he play a sport or something?"
25. For my nineteenth birthday I got a boxed set of the eight books in the Anne of Green Gables series. I read them over and over, starting with Anne of Green Gables and going all the way through to Rilla of Ingleside, and then starting back over at the beginning. I read the entire series fifteen or sixteen times that year. It was like an obsession for me.
26. I am extremely easy to amuse. I think it has something to do with living so rurally. When a high-school "party" is a bunch of your friends getting together and going for a walk in the middle of the night, you know it doesn't take much.
27. I haven't been sick enough to have to stay in bed, with the exception of recovering from surgery which doesn't really count, more than twice or three times since I've been married. The whole household (the whole COUNTY, it seems like) will be sick and I'm just fine.
28. I don't like Scarlett O'Hara.
29. I like reading about Jane Eyre but I think I might get tired of being friends with her.
30. I like the smell of diesel, if I don't have to be stuck behind the vehicle for miles but can just catch a whiff as it goes by.
31. I also like the smell of gasoline, and of new pavement.
32. When I was in high school I wrote an execrable poem (OK, a lot of them, but this is a specific example) with a line that went "couples dancing with their orange passion." I thought that was the best thing ever. Why nobody killed me in my sleep I still do not know, but I'm grateful.
33. I have never done any illicit drugs. I just never saw the need.
34. I have a scar on my forehead from when I slammed my bicycle into a pole when I was 5; one on my shin from when I jumped off a bus-stop bench (visiting a friend in a place civilized enough to actually have bus stop benches) and smacked my shin into a fire hydrant; one on my hand from when I was washing dishes as a teenager, put my hand inside a broken glass, and it sliced off a chunk of skin from my pinky knuckle on that hand.
35. I never put my hand inside glasses to wash them now.
36. I once stepped into a cattleguard at full walking speed. That doesn't feel good at all. (If you don't know what a cattleguard is you need to get out of the city for at least three years and then report back to me. Thank you very much).
37. I think I have pretty much confessed all the bad stuff I did as a teenager to my parents by now. (There would be a whole journal post all by itself, to go into those)
38. The only celebrities I have ever met or seen in person are authors.
39. I have a pointy chin.
40. I take the shoulder pads out of any clothing I get that has them. My shoulders are huge enough without them.
41. I walk very fast. Again, like the talking thing, though, I tend to think that I walk at a normal pace and everyone else dawdles.
42. I bring a book with me almost everywhere, especially if I'm going to be without children, just in case I get stuck waiting somewhere unexpectedly.
43. I remember smells so strongly that I can trick my brain into thinking I'm smelling a thing, and I can actually smell it at will, sort of.
44. I wear a size 12 (American).
45. I read very fast. I used to read a 300-page book each day when I had less to do (i.e. before I had children).
46. I hate centipedes and millipedes. Other than that I don't have any phobias.
47. I like to get a different kind of shampoo every time I buy it.
48. My favorite perfume is "Pleasures" by Estee Lauder, but it's too expensive to buy regularly, so most of the time I wear "Sand and Sable" instead.
49. My favorite place to visit is Morro Bay, California.
50. I live in a major tourist destination. The population of our small town mulitplies by more than 10 in the summer, if you count the people staying in the hotels.
51. My best girlfriend lives 2500 miles away from me. It makes it difficult to shop and "do lunch" together.
52. The first car with my name on the title was a 1966 Dodge Polara.
53. I get about 200-300 emails a day. That's less than it used to be.
54. Every year I try to read Jane Eyre during the first protracted spell of gray weather.
55. My husband calls me "Ducky". But absolutely nobody else does or is allowed to.
56. I do not have any furry pets, just fish, and I'm getting tired of those.
57. I had a horse from the time I was 9 until last year when she had to be put down.
58. The last furry pets I owned (never really considered my horse a pet, she was livestock ;-) were two cats named Chloe and Chelsea. They had litters within a month of each other, Chloe first. Chelsea was a poor mother so Chloe adopted her kittens. We gave them all away when we had our first baby.
59. Two of my grandmothers are still alive.
60. My husband's great-grandmother is still alive. One of her nieces is Tanya Tucker, the country singer.
61. I was raised on country music, REAL country music, and I roll my eyes at a lot of the modern stuff that gets called "country," even though I very rarely listen to that genre anymore.
62. The first computer I owned, other than the Atari 800 my family had in the 80's, was a 386 33MhZ (I think) PC with 2M RAM and a 256M hard drive. It was a really fast machine and my friends were extremely jealous that I only paid $400 for it. This was in 1993.
63. I sing alto.
64. I got an F in analytic geometry in high school, my junior year. That was the class where my extremely poor study habits finally caught up with me. Before that I was able to pull As, Bs, and the occasional C just by doing well on tests and quizzes even though I very rarely did homework in most classes.
65. I play the flute and the piano, but not often, and consequently, not very well anymore.
66. My 4-yo daughter looks a lot like me. My 7-yo son looks a lot like my husband. We joke that we cloned ourselves.
67. The woodstove is the only source of heat in my house. I like it that way. Wood's a lot of work but it's free, and it feels so cozy to have a fire.
68. We are still using the towels we got as wedding presents.
69. I wanted to try having red hair for years, so finally in late 1999 I tried it. Well, I tried auburn. It didn't look good on me.
70. We always put up our Christmas tree on the day after Thanksgiving, and we generally try to take it down on New Year's Eve or New Year's Day.
71. Three of my parents' five grandchildren were born on the day after a holiday: my nephews on the day after Thanksgiving and the day after Valentine's Day, and my middle daughter on the day after Christmas.
72. I have a black thumb. Any plant I own, from lawn grass on up, is doomed. This is largely because I am a loser and I forget to water things. But even when I do water things, somehow, I kill them.
    
73. I like the smell of brewing coffee but I can only tolerate the taste if it's blended with milk and stuff.
74. I taught myself HTML when I wanted to make a family webpage in 1996.
75. My husband's and my tenth wedding anniversary will be on March 19th, 2004.
76. My absolute utter money-is-no-object dream vacation would be a world tour on the Queen Elizabeth II. Assuming, that is, that I don't get seasick; since I've never been on the ocean in a boat, I don't know if I do or not.
77. My enormous forehead requires me to wear bangs. I grew them out once, and tried going without them for one school year. It was not a good thing.
78. My daughter inherited my forehead. Fortunately, she looks adorable with bangs.
79. Most of my female friends are people I've never met in person.
80. I dislike dark chocolate, except as chocolate chips in cookies.
81. I eat too many carbohydrates.
82. I am a Raiders fan by default. Before I was married I liked whatever football team was trendy (like the 49ers), or just didn't pay attention. However, becoming a Raiders fan was practically a written prerequisite for marrying my husband. ;-)
83. I love to watch ice skating, although I've only ice skated a few times myself.
84. I am not a sporty type. I don't throw well or catch well, or even run well, and I definitely don't jump well.
85. There's no such thing as too many books; there are only too few bookshelves.
86. I go to the same church as my parents, brother/SIL/nephews, and grandmother. It's like a mini-reunion every Sunday.
87. If I Google my name, I find a bunch of stuff about some woman about my age who lives in Illinois, and a few newsgroup posts from me, from the days when I wasn't so careful about putting my full name all over the Internet.
88. I do not like my feet.
89. I have worn glasses since junior high, although I didn't start wearing them constantly until I graduated from high school. I get bad headaches if I go without them.
90. I have never had braces.
91. My handwriting varies from extremely neat (but still not as neat as my mom's) to pretty messy (but not as messy as my brother's), depending on my mood more than on how quickly I'm writing.
92. When I was 15 I took a handful of Tylenol because I wanted (or, more accurately, I wanted people to think I wanted, if I am to be totally honest with my angst-y teenaged self) to kill myself. Having one's stomach pumped sucks. Don't ever try it just on a whim, OK? There are other ways to get your point across. Also, this incident left me with a distinct lack of faith (which endures to this day) in psychologists and the mental health industry in general.
93. I did a lot of stupid things as a teenager, but #92 was the stupidest.
94. I am a possessive, jealous type of person by nature, but I'm better about it than I used to be. When I was younger I would get irrationally unhappy (although I had the sense to at least try not to show it) if my close friends were close friends with other people as well. Same went for boyfriends -- if my boyfriend was friendly with my friends, it bothered me. I've improved a lot. Still, it's a good thing that I married a man who is similarly inclined.
95. On one side my extended family is quite dysfunctional. On the other it's the most normal family you could possibly imagine, for the most part.
96. I love swimming, although I am not very good at it; I always manage to look as if I were about to drown.
97. I am not picky about misspellings or grammatical errors in chats or casual emails, but it really bothers me to see them in purposefully published materials. I could go on and on about this. (just tonight I saw "post hold digger" in the "tools needed" list for a project at Home Depot and I had to physically restrain myself from shuddering).
98. I have really awful periods. My friends are all aghast when I tell them about them.
99. I don't see how it is that people think classical music is boring. A great deal of classical music makes me cry, it's so beautiful.
100. I get a new stuffed duck from my husband every year in the top of my Christmas stocking.

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Monday, November 24, 2003

Friday Five. So it's a couple days late, so sue me.

I forgot to do a Friday Five on Friday. No biggie except it actually looked interesting. :) Don't miss the staggeringly brilliant entry from earlier today.


1. List five things you'd like to accomplish by the end of the year.

By the end of THIS year? Yikes. I'd like to...

• lose 10 more pounds
  
• become less addicted to the computer
  
• get into an exercise regimen
  
• get my house back into a "maintain" mode -- I have a schedule which works brilliantly for this if I will just use it...
  
• read two books I've never read before
  

2. List five people you've lost contact with that you'd like to hear from again.

• Kelly, who was my piano teacher in junior high
  
• Joanna, friend from school who moved to the UK
  

That's all I can think of, really!

3. List five things you'd like to learn how to do.

• knit
  
• scrapbook (it just feels WRONG that this is used as a verb). I will have to give in eventually.
  
• you know that braid, for hair, that looks like a rope? I'd like to be able to do the fancy French version of that in my own hair.
  
• I'd like to learn sign language, for fun
  
• Does it count that I'd like to take CPA classes and/or nursing classes? It'll have to, I can't think of anything else
  

4. List five things you'd do if you won the lottery (no limit).

• Build a decent house in the middle of a large piece of property, so as to keep subdivisions at least that far away from my home no matter what happened to the parcels around ours
  
• Have my husband retire at age 33
  
• give a lot of it to various charities and our local library
  
• set up a fund for families of sick children so that they could spend less time stressing about money and more time dealing with more serious problems and enjoying their children
  
• never have health insurance again. Never ever ever.
  

5. List five things you do that help you relax.

• read
  
• take a hot shower
  
• read
  
• vege at the computer
  
• read
  

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Wednesday, November 19, 2003

80's music quiz

I ordinarily do not post those goofy little quizzes here, but this is cool; anyone born before 1977 or so should go do it, now. :)

have fun! :)

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firsts and lasts survey

First kiss:
Fourth grade, with my "boyfriend" Brian, my brother's friend who lived near the paddock where we kept our horses. It was a little peck, very quick, very embarrassing.

First real kiss:
Ninth grade, with my first serious boyfriend, Randy.

First job:
I just did a long post about this sort of thing; first job was working in the church nursery as a preteen.

First screen name:
rachelellen (good old WBS chat!)

First self purchased album:
Def Leppard, "Hysteria"

First funeral:
My grandfather's, when I was in sixth grade

First pets:
A little black dog named Tipper and a slightly larger, shaggy black dog named Belle

First piercing:
Ears, age 6

First true love:
Probably Randy, ninth grade. Although that's stretching "true love" quite a bit -- but we were very emotional about each other and stayed boyfriend and girlfriend for a year and a half. What we had pales in comparison to real adult love, and we were way too immature for a relationship really.

First big trip:
Nine states in two weeks, summer before ninth grade.

First musician you remember hearing in your house:
I was going to say Roger Whittaker but I think I have memories of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, etc., from before that.

Last big car ride:
How big is "big"? It's about four or five hours to Morro Bay, and we did that last summer. Five hours to LA, did that three and a half years ago. Twelve hours to Washington, did that four and a half years ago.

Last kiss:
This morning as T was leaving for work.

Last good cry:
about a week and a half ago.

Last movie seen:
"The Princess Bride", a few evenings ago

Last beverage drunk:
milk on my cereal (about to remedy that one also, with a yummy Diet COke)

Last food consumed:
Crispix (it's crispy times two!)

Last phone call:
T just called me right before I started typing this.

Last TV show watched:
Don't watch TV. Probably the last one we watched was the Super Bowl. Oh, wait, we plugged in the antenna for war coverage too, so Evening News with Dan Rather, last March.

Last shoes worn:
black canvas shoes, $4 at Wal-Mart

Last CD played:
Evanescence, "Fallen"

Last item bought:
holy cow, we just did a ton of Christmas shopping. I don't remember what the last thing was. Oh, wait! I went grocery shopping yesterday, and the last thing I put in the cart was a 12-pack of diet Coke.

Last disappointment:
I'm trying to help a friend of mine figure out how to do a Make A Wish trip for her son and we found out that part of it probably isn't going to be able to happen.

Last soda drunk:
Diet Coke, Diet Coke, Diet Coke (sung to the tune of "Let it Snow")

Last ice cream eaten:
Generic peanut-butter cup, about two weeks ago

Last shirt worn:
I have one on right now, my uber-comfortable baseball-jersey-style sweatshirt, heather-navy with navy sleeves, about three sizes too big for me, so so cozy.

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Tuesday, November 18, 2003

every job I ever had

Daydreaming On Paper gave me this prompt this morning:


List all the jobs you've ever had.


Well, you know me, I can't just list, I have to discuss. Here goes. :)

1. When I was 11 or 12 I started helping out, for $3 a week, in the nursery at the Methodist church I grew up in. I wasn't going to mention this, but then I realized that it really did influence my life in a lot of ways. And it's shocking to see the near-adults who were once babies I cuddled and changed.
   
2. The spring and summer during/after eighth grade, I spent nights at the home of my great-great aunt who had Alzheimer's. At that point in time she was fine with just someone in the house with her at night; they just didn't want her to be alone, and I lived right down the road and knew her quite well. She had a different idea of who I was every night, and she always offered me raisin toast in the morning for breakfast. I can still remember the pleasant old-ladyish smell of her house, the strawberry shampoo she had, the letters I would write to my friends lying on her guest bed. It was while I had that job that I learned that I could just concentrate as I was going to bed on getting up at a certain time (I always forgot to bring my alarm clock over there) and it would work. I can still do that when I want to. This "job" paid $12 a night, and it ended at the end of the summer when Aunt Hazel's caretakers started having full-time professional nursing care for her. I got paid all at once at the end of that summer and bought my first "cool" expensive clothes for the next school year. This was also a huge lesson -- I could see why my parents shopped at bargain outlets once I put down a whole summer's work on about two outfits (including a red sweater! even then...) plus a pair of very expensive shoes.
   
3. Then during ninth grade I had a boring job at the local Frostee-type place, taking orders for hamburgers and fries, making milkshakes and ice-milk cones. It was my first time-card taxes-paid kind of job, and nothing interesting happened there.
   
4. The next summer, I babysat full-time for a local single dad with two little boys. It only lasted about a month; after that the dad remarried and I was no longer necessary. It was another job where I learned a lot about little kids, and it was my highest-paying job till that point at $5 an hour, 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, under the table. The father worked in a shop right there at his house, and his assistant would pick me up for work every day as he drove past my house in his 1963 Dodge Dart station wagon. This is possibly the ugliest car ever created. It is at least in the top 3 ugliest cars.
   
5. The summer after tenth grade I worked as a maid in a hotel. This is simply not my kind of job. You don't mix with people, and you have to be so meticulous, and, well, I'm not and never have been.
   
6. In eleventh grade I had another frostee-freeze type job, at a different little diner in town. This job lasted six months. I gained 20 pounds in those six months; I developed the perfect (but extremely calorie-laden) burger; I learned to mop a floor properly and to flirt and to ward off unwanted advances (which was a heady feeling at the time, since I'd been a definite ugly duckling all my life). I went home every day reeking of bleach, and when I unbraided my hair and stepped into the shower at home there was a definite smell of French fries and grease pervading the air. It took a summer of being strict with myself and walking six miles a day to lose all that weight.
   
7. After that one, during the summer after eleventh grade and the beginning of my senior year, I had a job at a Mexican restaurant which was actually a lot of fun. The cooks and dishwashers were bona-fide card-carrying Mexicans, who sang to the waitresses and hostess in Spanish. The food was amazing, although I had learned from my previous job that sucking on the after-dinner mints all day and skipping my free meal would do my figure a lot more good than snacking from the nacho bin and eating a full plate on my dinner break. There was one night when the cooks and dishwashers all failed to show up; the owner cooked, the waitresses bussed their own tables and took over my hostess job, and I, in my silk skirt and blouse, ended up washing dishes. It was a very interesting experience, and it completely ruined that outfit in spite of the apron I had on.
   
8. had another brief stint after graduation at the second frostee-freez-ish place. It did not go well and I did not enjoy it.
   
9. I was rescued from that job by a family I had done a lot of babysitting for over the years. (I have neglected telling about all the babysitting I did; there were three or four families who used me a lot. It was a fun feeling to have them booking me for New Years' Eve two months in advance, before another family could get dibs. I loved all the kids and learned more from those jobs, as far as stuff I use now, than I did from any of the others.) Their in-home daycare provider had to have surgery and they asked me to take over. Thus began the best two years of my job life -- from 6 am to 6 pm, three days a week, I was in charge of three kids. When I started the full-time job they were ages 2, 4, and 7. The oldest, a girl, was the flower girl in my wedding. I worked there until I was pregnant with my son; the mother of the children was laid off work for a time, and when she went back, their previous provider was able to take over again. I see the children around town now -- the flower girl is now a senior in high school and a star on the volleyball team, the middle boy is a freshman, and the littlest girl (whom I held all night one new year's eve as she was teething) is in junior high and is taller than me. *sigh*. The scary thing is that that's going to happen with my children too, just as quickly.
   
10. During and after the time when I worked for them, I did a lot of substituting as a teacher's aide and secretary for the local school district. This was also a very interesting job and really informative and educational. I was an aide in a special education class, and I went with various kids as they "mainstreamed" into the HeadStart next door or into an elementary school classroom. Between that and the stint as assistant secretary in the special education department, I learned more than I ever thought I'd know about the workings of that system, and began to cement the thought in my mind that any children I ever had would be educated at home.
    
11. When my son was a baby I had a very brief child-care job with another family. I also spent a few days as a receptionist/hostess at my in-laws' microbrewery. Neither of these jobs were the least bit enjoyable or interesting.
    

And that's it. For seven years my job has been raising and teaching my own children. The pay is very low, but the benefits are just amazing. Best job I ever had by far. ;-)

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Thursday, October 23, 2003

99 questions answered -- I am such a sucker for surveys. This one is less inane than usual.

WHEW. I borrowed these 99 questions from Emily. I've been working on them a handful at a time over the past week or so.

1. What is your name?
well, I'm known as hsing-mom at Diaryland. I've probably let my name slip in here a few times...

2. Where and when were you born?
December 25th, 1974, in the same small California town where I live now

3. Who are/were your parents?
They are the people who married each other, conceived me, gave birth to me (well, one of them did), and raised me. :) They're still married (32 years and counting).

4. Do you have any siblings?
I have a brother, 2 1/2 years older than me.

5. Where do you live now, and with whom? Describe the place and the person/people.
I live in a medium-to-small rented house with my husband, our 7-year-old son, and our 4-year-old daughter.

6. What is your occupation?
I'm a homemaker and a homeschooling mom.

7. Write a full physical description of yourself. Include height, weight, race, hair and eye color, style of dress, and any tattoos, scars, or distinguishing marks.
What, am I a wanted suspect or something? :) I'm 5'8 1/2" tall, 174 lb (and going down), brown hair, brown eyes, caucasian, casual dresser, no tattoos, small scar on my forehead from when I slammed my bicycle into a pole when I was maybe 5.

8. To which social class do you belong?
I would say lower middle.

9. Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?
(I like the way this is phrased, hee hee). No, I am invincible non-allergic mega-ox-woman. Very low maintenance. I actually envied my higher-maintenance friends in high school but now I've realized how superior I am ;-).

10. Are you right- or left-handed?
Right-handed.

11. What does your voice sound like?
Low-pitched, a little nasal.

12. What words and/or phrases do you use very frequently?
Like. I say "like" way too much. Also "freaking", which I said in front of my dad the other day without realizing it, and he looked at me like I'd said the Real Bad Word. Whoops.

13. What do you have in your pockets?
Nothing.

14. Do you have any quirks, strange mannerisms, or annoying habits?
I talk too much. I push my glasses up against my shoulder when my hands are full.

Growing Up 15. How would you describe your childhood in general?
Happy at home, unhappy at school.

16. What is your earliest memory?
I think it's from the national bicentennial but I'm not sure that's when it was.

17. How much schooling have you had?
High school graduate, some not-for-credit night classes.

18. Did you enjoy school?
Some aspects of it, very much. Others, not at all.

19. What was your favorite subject in school?
It varied year by year. I always liked music. I also liked drama, physics, chemistry, algebra, geometry, English, and French.

20. While growing up, did you have any role models?
My parents.

21. While growing up, how did you get along with the other members of your family?
Really well.

22. As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
A teacher. A mom.

23. As a child, what were your favorite activities?
Reading, imaginative play, playing with my brother, riding my horse.

24. As a child, what kinds of personality traits did you display?
I was pretty annoying, I think. I didn't think before I spoke, and didn't have a clue how to fit in with other people. And quirky is not OK when you're in elementary school -- at least, it's not OK with the other kids.

25. As a child, were you popular?
Not at all.

26. When and with whom was your first kiss?
Aside from some stupid experimentation stuff with my friends' brothers and stuff, my first real "love" kiss was in ninth grade.

27. Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?
I've been married 9 1/2 years, so virginity is pretty much out. I lost my virginity at the end of ninth grade, unfortunately, with my first serious boyfriend.

Past Influences

28. What do you consider the three most important events of your life so far?
My marriage (although really, the wedding was just the beginning of that, and it is ongoing), the births of my children, and becoming a Christian.

29. Who has had the most influence on you?
hmm. My parents, my husband, Jesus -- lots of people have influenced me whether I knew it or not. Even the kids who were mean to me in school influenced me.

30. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
My children -- that so far, they are loving, generous, friendly, capable young people.

31. What is your greatest regret?
If it had been possible, I wish that I had known how to rise above the criticism of my peers when I was younger. But that's not really a regret, because I don't think anyone in that situation at that age can do that. I do wish I'd not had sex until I was married. It just made for uncomfortable embarrassment later on -- after all, I see my high school boyfriends and their families around town, and that's always between us -- that history of intimacy thrown away. I don't understand how people can have such a casual view of sex, I really don't.

32. What is the most evil thing you have ever done?
I haven't done a lot of evil things. When I was in high school there was a girl who was lower on the social scale than I was and I was kind of mean to her. OK, there's another one for my greatest regret as well.

33. Do you have a criminal record of any kind?
No.

34. When was the time you were the most frightened?
When my middle daughter was born.

35. What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?
I have answered this question in every single survey in this diary, it seems like. I don't know, it varies by what I think of as cringe-worthy, and it depends on whether the intention is to hear about an embarrassing gaffe I've made, or a moment when I was embarrassed by other people's unkindness. There are plenty of both, let's just say that.

36. If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?
See above under greatest regrets.

37. What is your best memory?
Oh, there are so many. My wedding, my wedding night. The births of my children, to a degree, although there was a lot of unhappy and scary stuff involved with those also. And I have a million happy memories of my life with my husband and children. As far as one thing that stands out, I'll pick one from before my marriage. It made me feel really special when I was about to turn 18, and my parents bought me this gorgeous red velvet dress I'd been eyeing for a while, and then my dad took us and my best friend out to a very fancy dinner at the Ahwahnee Hotel for my 18th birthday.

38. What is your worst memory?
There are also a lot of those, many of them from elementary school. Most of them are too painful to bring up right now. From adulthood, the loss of my middle daughter was very hard. The surgical births of my daughters (babies 2 and 3) were really scary -- one because she had serious life-threatening problems which we'd had no clue about until she came out of me, and the other because she exhibited some of the same symptoms as her sister, even though she had been checked for the same problems and found to be fine. Those were definitely the two worst days/nights of my life so far.

Beliefs And Opinions

39. Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?
Optimistic.

40. What is your greatest fear?
That something awful will happen to my children or husband.

41. What is your greatest comfort?
My belief in eternity. Being surrounded by my loved ones.

42. What are your religious views?
I am a born-again Christian -- I believe the Bible in its entirety.

43. What are your political views?
I'm morally and fiscally conservative. In the US this means that I'm opposed to spending a lot of money on social programs; I'm aware that the money people earn is their own and hence a tax cut is not "a break", it's just realizing that people should get to keep more of their own money; I'm opposed to abortion because it is the cruel and barbaric taking of an innocent human life; overall, I think people should be more responsible for the consequences of their actions than they usually are, and that people should be responsible for themselves in general whenever possible. If it weren't for abortion and drug legalization (which is a pretty minor factor for me, but still there), I would probably be a libertarian. When I first registered to vote, I registered as an "American Independent" -- also called the Taxpayers' Party if I remember correctly -- because the Republican party was too centrist for me. Now I'm a Republican, because the party moved back to the right a bit in the mid-90's.

44. What are your views on sex?
Sex is treated far too casually in our society. We've bought into this whole humans-are-just-animals thing a bit too far, and now we're telling our kids that they don't need to try to resist their hormonal urges because they can't anyway. This carries over into adulthood also, obviously, to the point where you're a weirdo if you don't have sex by the third date. And I think this is all very destructive to our culture, to our lives in general. Sex is the coupling of two people. Popular thinking reduces it to a simple connection of body parts, and it feels good, so why not do it? But really, intercourse puts two people together in a very serious and inextricable way. It causes a lot of emotional (and physical, but I'm not even going INTO that) difficulties when the relationship ends and it's time to move on -- all that shared intimacy becomes something to be sorry and embarrassed about. It's a lot of baggage. People who say sex shouldn't be reserved for marriage because that would somehow be boring or repressive don't know what they're missing. Married sex -- when you know this is the partner for the rest of your life, you have years and years to learn to do things exactly the way your spouse likes them done and vice versa, you can truly and really let yourself go with this person because you know there will not come a time when you're going to wish you could forget all these intimate moments... it's phenomenal.

45. Would you be able to kill?
If someone was threatening the safety and well-being of my children, my husband, my parents, myself -- you damn bet I would be able to.

46. In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?
So much evil has been done -- my inclination is to say something about abortion or mothers drowning their children or terrorism or the Holocaust, but unfortunately, humanity is certainly capable of evil beyond even those horrific situations.

47. Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?
I don't necessarily believe that there is One Person out there, and if you're in the wrong place or whatever you'll miss that one person and never be happy. But of course I believe in true love. And when you love someone enough, and spend time with him/her, that person becomes your soul mate, so to speak -- you become part of each other in a very real way. I think of it like two trees planted very close together -- the roots become so intertwined that to pull one out, you'd have to pull them both.

48. What do you believe makes a successful life?
Figuring out what your priorities are and living according to them. Surrounding yourself with people you love, and people you need, and people who need you. Being able to get by in a life that is enjoyable for you, without giving up on important things. Obviously it's something that's different for everyone, in my book.

49. How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings (i.e. do you hide your true self from others, and in what way)?
I am really outspoken about my thoughts and feelings, except with people in that middle ground between super close and not close at all. Like, say, my in-laws, who don't know me well enough that I feel like I can be totally open, but some kind of relationship has to be maintained with them. With just casual acquaintances, I really don't give a hoot what they think and I'll just let fly.

50. Do you have any biases or prejudices?
Everyone does. A bias is simply a predetermined set of beliefs or preferences. Anyone who says he's unbiased is either kidding himself, or he's a jellyfish who changes his mind every time a new opinion is presented. As far as prejudices -- that's a little different, or at least the word has different connotations -- this implies that you have judged a person or a set of people (or whatever) before becoming familiar with him/them/it. I think we all probably have some of those too, but I'm not aware of mine.

51. Is there anything you absolutely refuse to do under any circumstances?
Put an apostrophe in the wrong place. ;-)

52. Who or what, if anything, would you die for (or otherwise go to extremes for)?
My children. My husband. My parents. My brother and his family. I don't know about anything else -- my inclination is to say that there are more, but I wouldn't know until realistically put in the situation.

Relationships With Others

53. In general, how do you treat others (politely, rudely, by keeping them at a distance, etc.)?
Politely. Overwhelmingly.

54. Who is the most important person in your life, and why?
The most important physical earthbound person to me is my husband, followed VERY closely by my children. For obvious reasons.

55. Who is the person you respect the most, and why?
Oh my. That's a big question. I respect a lot of people for a lot of different reasons. (why is there always an emphasis on "most", I wonder?). I have a lot of respect for my grandmother for raising seven children on a shoestring and not losing her sense of humor. For my dad, for facing enormous physical pain every single day and maintaining a cheerful, positive, God-honoring outlook on his life. For my husband, for having the courage to leave behind a lifetime of very destructive beliefs and friends, to start fresh at 18 years of age and again at 23, and for maintaining the right course, and for being so different with his children than his father was with him. For my mother, for basically reinventing herself physically and emotionally through great strength of will, and for being the exactly the perfect kind of mother for me -- really, my parents were, by and large, the parents all my friends wished they had -- and they are the role models for my husband and myself as we bring up our own children.

56. Who are your friends?
I have a lot of friends, and yet I have almost no friends (the joy of the Internet, eh?). I am part of a very close circle of online friends in a mom's group; I have a lot of friendly internet acquaintances picked up in various ways; my best girlfriend is a woman who lives in Florida whom I've met one time but known inside and out for going on seven years. I have one friend who was my best friend in high school; we didn't contact each other for ten years but this past year we've reconnected and are quite good friends again -- but again, I haven't met her since we were teenagers. I do have some quite close friends who live near me, but there aren't many, and we never seem to get together and do "girlfriend" stuff. My very best friend is my husband -- and he was that before we "got together".

57. Do you have a spouse or significant other?
If you've been reading just about any of my answers you'll have gathered that the answer to this is yes. :)

58. Have you ever been in love?
Ah, yes. :)

59. What do you look for in a potential lover?
That wedding ring I put on his finger... ;). I'll change this into "What is about your spouse that drew/draws you to him," and I'll say: He and I agree on most things but disagree on others -- just enough for a healthy debate now and then ;-). Our priorities and values are the same. We enjoy each other's company; there's a megaton of that elusive "chemistry" everyone talks about between us, and there always has been. He respects me and I respect him; he doesn't talk down to me; he is my intellectual equal. He is a wonderful communicator, a good listener, my best friend. We complement each other in every way.

60. How close are you to your family?
Very close. We see each other multiple times every week and speak on the phone almost every day.

61. Have you started your own family?
Yes, I have two living children and a daughter in heaven.

62. Who would you turn to if you were in desperate need of help?
My husband. My parents. My brother. Beyond that, it depends on the kind of help.

63. Do you trust anyone to protect you?
Yes, I trust my husband and God. :) (and myself!)

64. If you died or went missing, who would miss you?
Lots of people, to varying degrees.

65. Who is the person you despise the most, and why?
Oh my. Most of the people I despise are public figures. Probably the MOST -- Hillary Clinton, sorry to the myriads of her fans. She is so intent on riding her husband's coattails to political success, while managing to push from behind at the same time. And of course I disagree with her on every possible issue there is, I think. Think of an issue, find her position on it, and chances are great that mine is the direct opposite. So she's handy that way, I guess. ;-þ

66. Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?
I touched on this a bit above in the answer about honesty about my thoughts and feelings. It depends on how close I am to the person. Super close or total strangers, I'll debate or argue (nicely and reasonably). It's the middle ground where I keep my mouth shut a lot because I don't want to offend.

67. Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?
Um, not really. Well, sometimes -- like online, in certain groups. But as a rule, no. Only when I am fed up with nobody else doing it -- like, say, putting together a field trip for a homeschool group.

68. Do you like interacting with large groups of people? Why or why not?
Not in general. Only if I'm feeling more confident than usual. Which is not often.

69. Do you care what others think of you?
I care what people close to me think, very much. And I care enough about the opinions of total strangers not to go to the post office in sweats -- but not a whole lot more than that.

Likes And Dislikes

70. What are your favorite hobbies and pastimes?
Reading, spending time with my family, cooking (but not cleaning up), crocheting, Internet stuff.

71. What is your most treasured possession?
I don't know. Probably something sentimental. My grandfather's 1919 edition of the Oxford Book of English Verse maybe.

72. What is your favorite color?
It varies. It's usually a variation of blue -- cobalt, navy, dark dark teal.

73. What are your favorite foods?
A really good steak. Olive Garden's chicken scampi. Cadbury Roast Almond bars.

74. What, if anything, do you like to read?
I have discussed this a lot in various formats -- my first real literary love as an adult is the classical literature like Austen, Dickens, Charlotte Bronte, etc. My VERY first literary love was good kid-lit like Beverly Cleary, Laura Ingalls Wilder, L.M. Montgomery -- and I still definitely enjoy these authors even now. And I also like good modern literature -- Elizabeth Berg, Maeve Binchy, Sara Donati, Diana Gabaldon. But heck, I'll read the back of the shampoo bottle, if I'm stuck sitting still with nothing else to read.

75. What is your idea of good entertainment (consider music, movies, art, etc.)?
I like listening to good music (from just about any era). I like good movies -- not too many "arty" or obscure ones, I have painfully plebeian cinematic tastes, I'm afraid. I enjoy old movie musicals, old movies in general, romantic comedies, adaptations of classic novels, non-gory thrillers, and some deep important movies as well.

76. Do you smoke, drink, or use drugs? If so, why? Do you want to quit?
No, no, no, n/a, and n/a. :)

77. How do you spend a typical Saturday night?
At home with my family.

78. What makes you laugh?
My children, my husband, sundry (and a lot of other diaryland diaries), movies, books. I'm easy to amuse.

79. What, if anything, shocks or offends you?
Well, there's shock and offense, and then there's shock and offense. In a way, a lot of things shock and offend me, because they are not the way I think they should be (like, say, people applauding a graphic video presentation of a partial-birth abortion). But in another way, I'm not shocked by that, because it's what I expect in a world that's as hell-bound as this one is. Sad to say.

80. What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself?
Fire up this machine and stare at the happy blue glow. Probably discover a bunch of diaries I'd never read before. ;-)

81. How do you deal with stress?
Not well. I don't have a lot of it, so I don't have a lot of practice. I yell. And I know I shouldn't yell, and I always resolve I won't, but I do. And I get twitchy and very easily irritated.

82. Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?
I like having plans, but I like spontaneity also.

83. What are your pet peeves?
Oh, there's a long list. Grammatical/word usage stuff (like skim/scan, misplaced apostrophes, overuse of exclamation points, public mis-spellings [I don't mind in chats, but please, if you're going to publish an ad or name a restaurant, for crying out loud, run it through a human spelling checker first...]) always comes to mind when I'm asked this question. Also common thoughtlessnesses like not using turn signals.

Self Images Etc.

84. Describe the routine of a normal day for you.
I get up in the morning around 8:00, supervise/fix breakfast for my children, and start school. School takes anywhere from one to two hours. I check my email and browse around online, do some housework, play with the kids, run errands. Make lunch. Make dinner. Clean up after dinner, get the kids ready for bed, and put them to bed. Then T and I have some time alone, and then I'm back on the computer until I feel like going to bed, generally around midnight. There are tons of variations, but this is the basic bare-bones weekday.

85. What is your greatest strength as a person?
I am very, very loving and dedicated to the people who are important to me. I am generous with my time and affection.

86. What is your greatest weakness?
A lack of discipline.

87. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
I would be more disciplined. :)

88. Are you generally introverted or extroverted?
Extroverted.

89. Are you generally organized or messy?
Messy. But I would dearly LOVE to be organized. I'm just too lazy to pull myself together for more than a week or two at a time.

90. Name three things you consider yourself to be very good at, and three things you consider yourself to be very bad at.
I am very good at: mothering, reading, and spelling. I am very bad at: washing dishes, working on cars, and writing.

91. Do you like yourself?
Yes, most of the time I do. And it hasn't always been this way, so I'm aware what a blessing that is.

93. What goal do you most want to accomplish in your lifetime?
I want to see my children grow into loving, capable, generous adults, with a solid faith.

94. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
The homeschooling mother of a 12-year-old and a nine-year-old, with a mortgage and some night classes under my belt.

95. If you could choose, how would you want to die?
The same way everyone says -- painlessly, as an old woman, with my family around me.

96. If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, name three things you would do in the time you had left.
I would write a long letter to each of my children about my love and my hopes for them. I would do the same for my husband. I would call or email many, many people to tell them how appreciated they are.

97. What is the one thing for which you would most like to be remembered after your death?
For being a loving person, faithful to God.

98. What three words best describe your personality?
Insecure, optimistic, joyful.

99. What three words would others probably use to describe you?
That depends on how well they know me.
Family/very close friends: Happy, loving, talkative.
Acquaintances and strangers: Weird, talkative, and ... cheerful?

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Wednesday, October 22, 2003

Unconscious Mutterings

Yet another Friday-Five-ish prop for when I don't have the energy for a real entry:


Unconscious Mutterings

1. Country:: USA
   
2. G:: spot. (Sorry, you'd almost think I was male, wouldn't you.)
   
3. Offer:: refusal (that's more typically feminine of me, isn't it.)
   
4. Connection:: link
   
5. Quest:: game
   
6. Lighthouse:: stormy
   
7. Sycamore:: spiky
   
8. Inhumane:: cruelty
   
9. Sneer:: sarcasm
   
10. Weapon:: useless (where did THAT come from?)
    

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Tuesday, October 21, 2003

Yet another frequently-inane survey apparently written by a young person trying to appear wacky and witty

I borrowed these 100 questions from Peyton's Place.

1. Are you an innie or an outie?
I'm going to assume this refers to belly buttons -- isn't just about everyone an innie?

2. Have you ever worn bell-bottoms?
Actually, yes, many of the clothes I wore in elementary school were hand-me-downs and many of the pants were bell-bottoms. (this was the early-mid 80's so they weren't THAT old). This did not help with my popularity problems. I had one pair in particular that was utterly putrid -- orchid-colored. It would probably be fashionable again now. gag.

3. Have you ever written a song?
I don't think so. I did a lot of pretentious self-important stuff as a teenager, because I thought I was just the best and brightest and the first person to ever feel the way I did or think of the things I thought of (which, I came to find out later, is a really common affliction of teenagerhood, witness the many teenage diaries at diaryland for confirmation of this), and I know I wrote a lot of really. Cheezy. Poetry. So I may have written a song too, but I doubt it.

4. Can you make change for a dollar right now?
If I'm allowed to borrow from my son's money jar. He always has more money than I do.

5. Have you ever been in the opposite sex's public toilet?
I used to work for several different restaurants, and part of my job was cleaning bathrooms. So yes.

6. Have you ever smelled your own feet?
Um, who hasn't?

7. Do you like catsup on or beside your fries?
I dip in catsup. But if there's vinegar available I sprinkle that on top, with lots of salt. Yummers. Especially good with fish and chips but even just plain fries will do.

8. Can you touch your tongue to your nose?
No.

9. Have you ever been a boy/girl scout?
I was in Brownies and Juniors. Then my dad and brother were heavily involved in boy scouts so I was always hanging around that as well.

10. Have you ever broken a mirror?
Many, many times.

11. Have you ever put your tongue on a frozen pole?
No.

12. What is your biggest pet peeve?
Oh, wow, there are so many. Drawing one of the many at random, I would have to say... when people say "scan" and really mean "skim" (as in, "I just scanned it quickly, I didn't really read it carefully."). yarrrg.

13. Do you slurp your drink after it's gone?
No, that really gets on my nerves. Eating shouldn't make noise.

14. Have you ever blown bubbles in your milk?
When I was little.

15. Would you rather eat a Big Mac or a Whopper?
Whopper, whopper, whopper. McDonalds is like the British version of American food -- so bland.

16. Have you ever gone skinny-dipping?
Yes, in a scenic river by moonlight the summer when I was 17, with my best friend. It was fun. One of those things I would NEVER do again, but I'm glad I have the memory.

17. When you are at the grocery store, do you ask for paper or plastic?
Paper. We have a woodstove and the paper bags are great for putting your burnable garbage in and then just throwing in the stove.

18. True or False: You would rather eat steak than pizza.
Definitely, definitely true. No contest at all.

19. Did you have a baby blanket?
No.

20. Have you ever tried to cut your own hair?
I actually did, just before starting high school. It came out not well but not TOO badly. I don't know why I did it, though. And I always cut my own bangs.

21. Have you ever sleepwalked?
Once.

22. Have you ever had a birthday party at McDonalds?
No, barf.

23. Can you flip your eye-lids up?
I don't try.

24. Are you double jointed?
No.

25. If you could be any age, what age would you be?
I like the age I am, and I like the stage I'm at in my life.

26. Have you ever gotten gum stuck in your hair?
When I was little I did.

27. Have you ever thrown-up after a roller coaster ride?
No.

28. What is your dream car?
Either a Dodge Durango or a convertible Chrysler Sebring. Probably I would like to own the Durango, but rent the Sebring once, or lease it for a little while. Convertibles are a pain to own, from what I understand.

29. What is your favorite cartoon of all time?
I am not much into cartoons. Do VeggieTales count?

30. Would you go swimming in shallow waters where, one year earlier, a shark had attacked a child?
Generally sharks don't attack in shallow water, do they?

32. Have you ever eaten a dog biscuit?
I tasted dog food once when I was little, but no, I have never actually eaten a dog biscuit.

33. If you were in a car sinking in a lake, what would you do first?
Unbuckle the children, get the door open, and get them out.

34. Have you ever ridden in an ambulance?
No.

35. Can you pick something up with your toes?
Pencils and stuff, yes, can't everyone?

36. How many remote controls do you have in your house?
4. TV (which should also work the VCR and DVD player but it doesn't), VCR (which also works the TV but not the DVD player), camcorder, and DVD player.

37. Have you ever fallen asleep in school?
Not that I remember.

38. How many times have you flown in an airplane in the last year?
None. I have never been in an airplane.

39. How many foreign countries have you visited?
None. I almost went to Mexico once, on my honeymoon, but there was rioting in Tijuana that day so we stayed in San Diego and didn't go there.

40. If you were out of shape, would you compete in a triathlon if you were somehow guaranteed to win a big, gaudy medal?
Um, no.

41. Would you rather be rich and unhappy, or poor and happy?
I have been poor and happy pretty much all my life, to one degree or another, relatively speaking. (I mean, compared to a family in Africa, we're rolling in money. But compared to the national average, we've never been very well off). I would definitely choose that route over rich and unhappy.

42. If you fell into quicksand, would you try to swim or try to float?
I would probably try to tread water. Quicksand is where a spring is coming up under a sandpit, and the sand floats on top of the water. Interesting, huh.

44. Do you ask for directions when you are lost?
Yes. If I can buy a map, I do that first. Otherwise I just ask.

45. Have you ever had a Mexican jumping bean?
No, but there is a larvae that lives in our local oak trees that is similar.

46. Are you more like Cinderella or Alice in Wonderland?
Um, neither. I do not live a life of drudgery, but I love books without pictures.

47. Would you rather have an ant farm with no ants or a box of crayons with broken points?
Ant farm with no ants.

48. Do you prefer light or dark bread?
Medium. I don't like the REALLY dark stuff, like Russian rye, but I don't like plain white bread either. Although a good French bread is nice.

49. Do you prefer scrambled or fried eggs?
Depends on my mood. Probably scrambled most of the time.

50. Have you ever been in a car that ran out of gas?
Yes, a couple of times.

51. Do you talk in your sleep?
Yes.

52. Would you rather shovel snow or mow the lawn?
Mow the lawn, hands down.

53. Would you rather be bitten by a poisonous snake or constricted by a python?
Neither! But I suppose the bite would be easier to treat.

54. Have you ever played in the rain?
Frequently. I love playing in the rain.

55. Which do you think is more dangerous: an angry bear or a hungry white shark?
Angry bear. I'm generally not in the vicinity of a hungry white shark, but bears are a fact of life where I live (although generally they only attack garbage cans and dog food). (what is up with this survey? Was the person who wrote it obsessed with death?)

56. Would you climb a very high tree to save a kitten?
No, they'll come down on their own. Although if the tree was easy to climb, yes, I would, because I enjoy climbing trees.

57. Can you tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator?
I think so.

58. Do you drink pepsi or coke?
Diet Coke.

59. What�s your favorite number?
I don't have one.

60. If you were a car, would you be an SUV or a sports car?
I would be an SUV. And not a new shiny one either -- I'd be like a 1975 Travelall or something -- clunky and ugly, but utilitarian and good to have around.

61. Have you ever accidentally taken something from a hotel?
I don't think so.

62. Would you blow your nose at the dinner table?
No.

63. Have you ever slipped in the bathtub?
Yes.

64. Do you use regular or deodorant soap?
I change every time. Right now we have Ivory. Before that we had Coast (the eye opener!)

65. Have you ever locked yourself out of the house?
Yes, a couple of times.

66. Would you rather make your living as a singing cowboy or as one of the Simpsons voices?
Singing cowboy.

67. If you could invite any movie star to your home for dinner, who would it be?
Ewan McGregor. He could sing for me, and he could play light sabers with my husband and son.

68. Have you ever gotten a truck driver to honk his horn?
Oh yes, we used to do this all the time. Trains too.

69. Which would you rather live with: a huge nose or crossed eyes?
Probably the nose.

70. Would you hang out with someone your best friend didn't like?
This is so high school. Yes.

71. Would you hang out with someone your best friend liked, but you didn't like?
I doubt it.

72. Have you ever returned a gift?
Yes.

73. Would you give someone else a gift that had been given to you?
Um, I did this once.

74. If you could attend an Olympic Event, what would it be?
Ice dancing.

75. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
maybe... 7?

76. If your grandmother gave you a gift that you already have, would you tell her?
No. In fact this already happens, squared. Both of my grandmothers get me a subscription to Reader's Digest every year. I called the company about this, and they said that what will happen is that every year, I'll get a two year subscription added to what I already have coming to me. I figure, eventually, they will die, and I will have years and years of Reader's Digest subscriptions to remember them by.

77. Do you sing in the car?
Yes.

78. Would you rather jump into a dumpster or into a vat of honey?
Ugh, neither. The dumpster, probably, though, because I could wash it off easier, and chances are I'd land on TOP of stuff and not IN it.

79. What is your favorite breed of dog?
This is a tough question. I like border collies a lot. But they are impractical where I live because of stickers -- short hair makes more sense.

80. Would you donate money to feed starving animals in the winter?
You mean wild animals? Um, no. Animals would all have died off thousands of years ago if God had not given them their own mechanisms for surviving winters. Although I'm not opposed to feeding birds and stuff, don't get me wrong.

81. If you were a bicycle, would you be a stingray or a mountain bike?
I don't know what a stingray is.

82. What is your least favorite fruit?
Raisins.

83. What kind of fruit have you never had?
I live in California; I think I have probably had most kinds at one time or another.

84. If you won a $5,000 shopping spree to any store, which store would you pick?
Barnes and Noble. Woo hoo!

85. What brand sports apparel do you wear the most?
Um, I don't wear sports apparel.

86. Are/were you a good student?
I was smart but I lacked study skills. So no.

87. Among your friends, who could you arm wrestle and beat?
Most of them. I'm a pretty bulky, muscular, ox-like, low-maintenance person, and most of them were skinnier and smaller than me, even some of the boys.

88. If you had to choose, what branch of the military would you be in?
The Marines, and I'd be in the band. (I thought about doing this).

89. Would you ever parachute out of a plane?
Only if necessary, never for fun.

90. What do you think is your best feature?
My eyebrows.

91. If you were to win a Grammy, what kind of music would it be for?
It would be a special award for saving the world from undue pain by never singing alone in a public place, I'm sure. Although I do decently in a choir.

92. What is your favorite season?
Early spring -- say, like February, when narcissus are coming up and the grass is green but it's still chilly. But I like crisp autumn days and foggy days and snowy winter days and pouring rainy days as well. Basically anytime that's not summer.

93. How many members do you have in your immediate family?
4 living.

94. Which of the five senses is most important to you?
I hate this question. I can never just choose one. As far as what would require the most difficult adjustment if I had to learn to live without it, probably sight. But never to hear Vivaldi again... ack.

95. Would you be a more successful painter or singer?
Singer, marginally, but I wouldn't ever actually be a success at either. Unless I could get away with painting houses, at which I'm no better or worse than the average person.

97. How many years will/did you end up going to college?
Zero. None. Zilch. I imagine I'll spend years at it when I do it though, going just at night for a long time before the kids cease to need me during the days at which time I hope to go full-time.

98. Have you ever had surgery?
Three c-sections and a tonsillectomy (not in that order).

99. Would you rather be a professional figure skater or professional football player?
Figure skater. But considering that I have a hard time walking across my living room without breaking my toes (literally), it's never gonna happen.

100. What do you like to collect?
Turtles (not live ones), bookmarks, and books.

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Tuesday, September 23, 2003

a long (and often idiotic) survey

do you type really fast? I would say that I type pretty fast, but not really fast.

does it annoy people who are around you (like in the library)? I almost never type around other people.

do you/did you like high school? I liked learning. I liked being with my few friends. The rest of high school pretty much sucked.

how old are you? 28

do you know anyone who has the same birthday as you? if so name them There was a boy in my freshman English class who was born ten minutes before me (except he was actually born 2 hours and 10 minutes before me, because he was born in Colorado). Um, I think there are a few others I know but I'm blanking on them.

favorite pen color I don't care, black or blue is fine.

what word do you constantly misspell when typing? I don't misspell. I do make a lot of typos but generally I correct them.

do you have trees in your yard? Yes, lots.

name one comedian that everyone thinks is funny but you absolutely cannot stand Um, I don't watch comedians. Sorry.

name one director you hate and tell why I am not good at this kind of question. There are movies I like and movies I don't; I don't generally pay attention to who directs them.

do you like tim burton? I am not sure I've ever seen anything he directed.

what annoys you more than anything? a mosquito whining around my ear at night.

tell me about the weirdest pair of socks you own I do not own weird socks.

if you woke up tomorrow morning as the opposite sex, what would you do first? Shave.

did you read fear street books? um, no, these were after my time.

how about sweet valley high? only when forced to.

babysitter's club? the boxcar children? babysitter's club, I read a couple of in junior high. I didn't read any Boxcar Children books until I had children of my own.

goosebumps? Are you kidding? Kids I babysat read Goosebumps books.

favorite show on nickelodeon (can be from the late 80's/early 90's when nick was good) The Donna Reed Show.

did you watch are you afraid of the dark? Ask me if I've heard of this and the answer would be the same: no.

did zeebo the clown scare you? who?

where do you vacation every summer? Morro Bay

do you like the beach? Yes

do you tan or burn easily? I will burn if I'm not careful. Then I tan afterward.

do you make up your own words and lingo? if so tell me about it not really.

do you eat lots of tv dinners? I haven't eaten a TV dinner in about 20 years.

favorite hot pocket flavor Um, I wouldn't know. I think I ate one of these once but I don't know what was in it.

if you could make one celebrity magically disappear, who would it be? Oh, there are many. Too many to list.

how is life treating you? just dandy

do people like you? some do. Most don't, I think.

what do you think it is that makes the "popular" people popular? Believe it or not I have dedicated lots of serious thought to this over the years. To an extent, it's obvious: conformity (even if that means conforming via obvious non-conformity), the right clothes, the right look. But there's something more to it -- something I've never been able to put my finger on. We all know people from our school experience who weren't really ugly, weren't stupid, yet even if you put them in the clothes of the moment and gave them the right haircut and stuff, still, they wouldn't be It. It's really scary that there's an environment to which we are all expected to subject our children (although not all of us do!) where they can be made miserable so easily just because they don't have that magical elusive Something.

what do you wear the most: jeans, cords, dickies, khakis, skirts, or shorts? Um, probably jeans, followed by shorts.

are you using a pc or mac? an antiquated Pleistocene-era PC

do you like chunky peanut butter? Yes. But we don't buy it often because my daughter hates it. It has only recently occurred to me that I could buy both.

what amazes you about the opposite sex? The fact that they can be so hung up on cars. It's a CAR. It's not a friend or a loved one or even anything alive like a horse or a pet. But you would never know it based on typical male behavior. It doesn't bother me, it's just totally foreign to me.

are you in love with anyone? Yep.

do you like anyone? I like lots of people! ;-) (if no other question in this survey did so, that right there proves that this was written by someone born after 1986, no?)

if so, who see above

why do you like them/why are you in love with them? Oh dear. Do you have all day? My husband is my other half, the completion of me. He is the one person I can always trust to be on my side, he knows me inside and out, stands by me no matter what, sees the beauty in me that everyone else misses, and holds my soul in the palms of his hands. Plus, he has really sexy arms. ;-)

favorite cereal Grape-Nuts.

name a movie that makes you cry Lots of movies make me cry. Especially, and this is kind of goofy, movies with scenes where a lot of people are emotional all at once. Like the end of Mr. Holland's Opus or even the end of, God forbid, SpaceCamp. But also tender scenes -- like when Kathleen Kelly is closing her store for the last time and remembering twirling with her mother. That one gets me every time.

what's something you like about the opposite sex, physically, that your friends think is odd? I don't know if my friends think it's odd, but they might. Arms. mmm. wrists.

is it true that only the good die young? This is an idiotic question.

if so, are you going to live forever or die soon? see above.

do you live for today? Not entirely. I enjoy today as much as I can, and get out of it whatever I can (well, except the days when I spend all my time washing dishes, folding laundry, and sitting in front of the computer), but I have to live for the future or when the future came I'd be very sorry I hadn't.

how fast can you run? I used to be able to run faster than average, with decent endurance, but nothing spectacular. I haven't run much in the last ten years. I walk extremely fast, though. I hate getting behind slow people walking, even more than I hate getting behind slow people driving.

favorite band from the 60's/70's Simon and Garfunkel.

have any of your friends had kids as teenagers? not my close friends, but school acquaintances, yes. (heck, my MOM was a teenager when she had my brother. But she was married. She was 19. And I had my first baby at 21.)

did they finish high school? Yep.

favorite 80's television show "Who's The Boss?"

were you even born in the 80's? NO! Crap! I am ancient!

what year? 1974

have you ever taught a little kid a curse word? when I was about 13 I did

if so which one was it? I don't remember

do you think little boys are horrendously ill behaved? Little boys vary, just like all people. There are even, believe it or not, teenage boys who don't wear low-rise ill-fitting pants. I know, I know, but really, it's true.

have you ever thrown anything at a moving car? if so, what? No. But in high school, my best friend, on her last day before moving away, threw a rock at a boy on the bus. She lived with me, and we were of course together at the time, having just gotten off the bus to go home. She was on the ground, he was in the bus, and it was moving away. She broke the back window of the bus, because she failed to account properly for the bus's forward motion when she threw the rock. Oops. The boy really deserved it, too.

name a villian in a movie that scared you when you were a kid it's a TV show, not a movie, but that guy with the mask in that episode of Little House On The Prairie where the girl gets raped -- that totally freaked me out. I had nightmares about that guy for YEARS.

have you seen the original friday the thirteenth? nope. But I did see the first few Nightmare on Elm Street movies.

the original chucky? nope

the original halloween? nope

what's your favorite channel? I do not watch TV. Really. I have a television, but no antenna or cable is attached to it; it is simply a monitor for the DVD player and the VCR. So I am FREE from all this crap, and I do NOT HAVE A FAVORITE CHANNEL. Although sometimes I miss PBS, for the kids' shows.

what do you say when you stub your toe off of the corner of the coffee table? I repeat OW a lot. Sometimes I say "crap".

what's the highest thing you've ever jumped off of and landed unharmed? this is kind of a goofy question. Um, when I was little we used to suspend ourselves from our porch railing (we being my brother and myself) and drop. I'd guess it was about six feet from our feet to the ground.

does it snow where you live? sometimes.

if yes, do you go sled riding? we don't get that much snow. And I don't own a sled.

have you ever used anything weird, like a frisbee or a trashcan lid, for a sled? no, but I've used an old car hood. And of course tractor inner tubes. Who doesn't?

how many people do you know who were born in november? Um, right offhand I can think of three.

what month has the most people you know born in it? Um, maybe September.

do holidays make you festive? To a degree, yes.

magazines you subscribe to None, but my husband buys "Sky and Telescope" every month.

do you read the supermarket tabloids? Since there's usually nothing else for my eyes to rest on in the supermarket line, I read the headlines and laugh.

have you ever smashed somebody's halloween pumpkin? um, no. Again with the weird questions.

ever had yours smashed? Also no.

do you celebrate christmas? Yes.

if not, do you still watch "how the grinch stole christmas" when it comes on television? See above re:television.

do you think the grinch movie starring jim carrey was a waste of money? Probably, but I never saw it.

ever had a hot teacher? I had crushes on a few teachers but I wouldn't say they were "hot".

if yes, did you flirt with him/her? No. I just tried to avoid blushing when they spoke to me, and when I spoke to them.

how do you treat people you are attracted to? (this is not a stupid question; some people are immature and are mean to those they like) I think I was pretty stupid around them, back in the day.

what do you want for your birthday this year? A 100-disc CD changer, a new stereo receiver unit, and Barnes and Noble gift certificates.

have you ever egged somebody's house? Nope

has someone ever egged yours? No, but our car got TP'd and shaving-creamed once.

do we all go a little mad sometimes? Um, probably.

what pisses you off more than anything in the world? Abortion.

do you still go trick or treating? No

do you believe in santa claus? No

have you ever worked in a supermarket? No

how about a restaurant? Yes, several

if yes, do you agree with me when i say that those are the two worst establishments to work in? Actually, I liked working in restaurants. I thought it was fun.

what color is your bedspread? um, blue, with flowers.

do your eyes change colors? nope, but they have freckles.

do you believe that we walked on the moon? yes

do you live by yourself? no

have you ever gotten a computer virus? years and years ago, before Internet, from a floppy disk my brother-in-law used on our computer.

if so, what was it and how did you get rid of it? My brother-in-law fixed it.

describe your junior high/middle school gym teacher Well, I had two different ones in junior high (both men) and two in high school (both women). They were pretty boring as far as description goes. 7th grade: soft kind of nice man I'd known my whole life. 8th grade: this guy looked like the drawings of Neanderthal Man in our school books, but he was really nice; I remember at some school talent show he dressed up as one of the guys in ZZ Top and did a lip-synch thing. High school #1: skinny, not young. She had been my mother's PE teacher as well. Everyone says she's a lesbian but I know her personally and she's not. High school #2: buxom, feminine, ag-oriented. She was nicer to the popular girls than to the unpopular ones, which really bothers me in a teacher, but overall she was a good teacher.

how do you react when someone is talking to you --up in your face-- and they have really bad breath? as subtly as possible.

what was your first date like? Um, my parents took us and dropped us off at the theater in the next town over. We watched "Look Who's Talking". If I remember correctly my best friend was also there. She pretended to time us kissing (my first real kiss). I was in ninth grade.

did you go/are you going to the prom? Yes, I did.

if you've already gone, was it good or bad? explain why It sucked. My date was a dolt.

do you get uneasy when you see a person of a different color than you walking down the same street as you in the middle of the night? I generally do not walk down the street in the middle of the night, and I live in a town that is 99% caucasian, so I don't have this experience. However, when I'm in the city at night, I'm wary of almost everyone, regardless of pigmentation levels.

if yes, do you think that makes you racist? n/a

are you a vegetarian? nope

how about vegan? see above

if no to both, do you think you could be? only if absolutely necessary.

have you ever given up a certain type of food? if so, what was it and why did you do it? For one summer in high school I stopped eating meat, to lose weight, because I always ate too much meat.

spit out a random song lyric for me. make sure you tell me the name of the song and who sings it! I have Simon and Garfunkel on the brain thanks to a question up there, so here goes: "in the halo of a streetlamp, I turned my collar to the cold and damp, when my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light that split the night" -- Sound of Silence

who does the chores around your house? We all have various chores. Mostly the kids and me, since we're the ones home all day.

what movie could you watch a million times and never get tired of? Probably none, really, but Pride and Prejudice is probably the closest to this.

what movie have you watched a million times, and you still laugh at the jokes? do you know that to watch a movie a million times would take 228 years of constant watching for a 2-hour movie? I don't think anyone would be laughing at jokes after 228 years. But that scene in Sleepless in Seattle when the men are making fun of the way the woman talks about a movie -- that one hasn't failed yet...)

what movie do you hope you never see again? there are many, I'm sure, but I can't think of one offhand.

have you ever hugged a stuffed animal or pillow and pretended that it was your significant other, or someone you had a crush on, and then someone caught you talking to it, and stroking its soft, fuzzy fur, and laughed at you and told the whole school? speaking of stupid questions... no.

do you drive? Yes

if so, do you like to drive at night or in the day time? I like driving at night if there's not a lot of oncoming traffic; the headlights bother my eyes after a while.

has anyone ever called you a bitch? Yes, a long time ago.

has anyone ever called you an asshole? Probably

are you a bitch/asshole? No.

what's the first thing you do when you get home from school/work? I don't go to school/work.

favorite pop tart flavor The ONLY pop tarts I like are strawberry ones WITHOUT frosting. That frosting stuff is terrifying.

do you play any musical instruments? Yes, I play the piano and the flute.

have you ever built a snowman? Yes

did you cry when it melted, or when the kid next door knocked its head off with a shovel? "the kid next door" is a pair of ladies who are probably in their late 80's; they don't do a lot of snowman vandalism. And no, I didn't cry when it melted.

what's your religion? Christian

do you try to force it on other people? sigh. It is impossible to force religion on ANYONE, we all have the ability and right to decide things for ourselves. I occasionally tell people what I believe and why. But even if I could, I wouldn't force it on anyone; if it were possible to do so, it would fully negate the value of any beliefs at all.

do you knock on people's doors at 7 a.m. on saturdays, trying to give them a pamphlet and tell them about the lord, or ask random people at the mall if they’ve been saved, yet you think that doesn’t count as forcing religion, you son of a bitch? I do not do these things. People who do are annoying to the general populace. However, they're not forcing. See above.

have you ever been flipping channels late at night and caught a glimpse of some porn on skinemax? see above re:television.

if so, did you watch it? don't say no, i know you did n/a

what's the code word or phrase you and your friends use for the word SEX? um, sex. Sorry to disappoint you, but we're adults.

is sex an uncomfortable topic for you? Not in the right company.

what is the one thing in the world that just looking at it makes you vomit, or come close to it? I can't think of anything genuine offhand. In a previous life I would have put something rude and bitter here. But I'm not like that now. ;)

when other people vomit, does it make you sick? Are you kidding? I'm a mother. I can change puky clothes, wipe puky faces, tables, and chairs, and then resume eating my own meal. Or if T is dealing with the mess, I can eat right through the whole thing.

do your clothes match? generally I try to make sure they don't clash.

what are you wearing right now? a pair of cheezy overall shorts, too short for someone built like me. I'm not going out of the house in this, I just got tired of being in my jammies every day for hours, so I resolved to start getting dressed as soon as I got out of bed. And this was the first thing I pulled out of my drawer this morning.

did you ever have those fisher price roller skates that go over top of your shoes? No, but I had a pair of the roller-rink kind.

did you have a bike with a banana seat? Yes

could you ride it? Yes

have you lived in the same house your entire life? No. have lived in about 15 different houses -- only two (on the same property) since I got married though.

what’s the weirdest thing you’ve lived next to? hmm. I lived next to a wrecking yard once, and I lived in an apartment above the shop at a sand and gravel plant. Most people would probably think that was the weirdest place. Especially since it is next to a man-made pond on a creek about a mile down from the local sewage treatment facility, and your average person from my town has the mistaken idea that that pond has something to do with the sewer. But it doesn't.

who is the ugliest person you’ve ever seen? This is a mean question. I'm not gonna answer it.

do you watch talk shows? see above re:television.

do you think miss cleo is full of shit? who the heck is miss cleo?

if not, have you called her and wasted your money, you idiot? huh?

what are your thoughts on keeping animals in captivity? It's very useful in zoos. Most of us would never see most of those animals live and in person if they weren't in a zoo. And I have no problem with domesticated animals either.

what do you think of all the “superstores” that are popping up everywhere? (super walmart, super k-mart, super target)? They're very convenient. (there are super Targets?). But I've never been in one, unfortunately.

what do you think of pop music? Some of it is OK, especially from the 80's.

tell me something i don’t know In France, they say that ducks say "Couin", and roosters say "Co-co-ri-co!"

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Friday, September 19, 2003

nap, and the Friday Five

T shifted his work schedule today -- went in two hours early so he could get off two hours early as well -- and when he came home, he was going to take our trash to the dump. Both kids inexplicably wanted to go with him. As an aside, garbage time is one of those times I am SO glad to be a woman, married to a big manly man. It's his job, I don't have to go to the stinky smelly dump and throw bags of nasty trash into a hole or a huge dumpster or whatever they have set up for the purpose for that trip. Hey, I'll bear the children and do the cooking and cleaning up and child-teaching and nose-wiping and 2:30 a.m. tending and stuff, if he'll be the one to get up at five every weekday and go work his hiney off 40 minutes from home so that we can have a roof over our heads and food to eat and stuff like that... if he'll go to the dump too. That's the deal. Anyway, I digress. The kids both wanted to go with him, so I got an unexpected nap, which was just what I needed. I lay on the couch with two cans of diet Coke, two Advil, an Outlander book, my heating pad, my three pillows, a blanket, and a deep sense of pervading joy. I took the Advil with the first drink of diet Coke, and pretty much slammed the whole can right down; then I drank the second can slightly more slowly while I read for a while. Meanwhile my heating pad was not cooperating -- I'm not sure it was even reflecting my own body heat, let alone producing its own. Granted, it's a very old heating pad, and you know how they all say on that read-this-or-thou-shalt-surely-die warning label thingie that you should never lie on them? Well who pays any attention to that? Of course we've been lying on it for the entire nine years of our ownership of it (and I think we got it from my parents when they got a new one, so it was probably well-used before that also). Anyway, maybe there's a reason you're not supposed to do that; maybe they just sort of stop working after ten or twenty years of being laid upon. Who knew. I ignored it though, and figured I could sleep without the extra heat, but I'd snuggle my lower back up against it really nicely just in case it decided to do its job. Then just as I was about to drift off, I started getting this bizarre tingly-fingers feeling, and my heart rate acted a little funny. Now, in retrospect, I know that this was most likely just the effect of having drunk 24 oz of caffeinated soda just prior to lying down and attempting to sleep -- all that drug-induced energy had to go somewhere, so it was just kind of fizzling through my body looking for an outlet, is my thought. At the time, however, just on the verge of sleep (last night at this stage I had a long and detailed semi-dream about meeting Diana Gabaldon on a shuttle bus in Yosemite, for example), I was relatively certain that it was that heating pad seeking revenge for having been relentlessly laid down upon for so many years by slowly electrocuting me. Hey, I was on the verge of sleep, shut up.


At any rate, I was too tired to care, and I had such a nice long solid nap, so solid and long that I woke up with that dreadful slept-in-the-daytime feeling just as T and the kids arrived home. I consoled myself with another diet Coke and a chicken caesar salad, and everything looked so much brighter.


Tomorrow T and LT are heading for San Diego overnight, and C and I will be having a ladies' weekend in, for the most part. We'll play "dress-up princess" (in other words, she'll try on all the hand-me-downs I just got from my aunt for her, to see which ones will go in her drawers/closet and which ones will go in a box for next year), and I have made us a reservation at our favorite semi-fancy restaurant, where we'll wear nice dresses. This is to make the time special for us too, since we couldn't go with the boys on their Charger-sheet-metal pickup trip. I've been looking forward to it as much as T has been looking forward to acquiring his rear quarter skins, or whatever they're called.



Here's the Friday Five.


1. Who is your favorite singer/musician? Why?

I am awful at this question and I can never pick one person/group/artist. I like such a variety of music. If I had to pick one artist to listen to for the rest of my life, I'd probably pick, hmm, Mozart.



2. What one singer/musician can you not stand? Why?

I don't know any names, and one benefit of adulthood is that I don't have to listen to music I don't like, so I'm not highly qualified to answer this question. I don't like rap, I can say that for sure.



3. If your favorite singer wasn't in the music business, do you think you would still like him/her as a person?

This is a bit of a strange question. Liking someone as an artist doesn't imply liking him or her as a person to begin with. It would vary with the person.



4. Have you been to any concerts? If yes, who put on the best show?

n/a, never been to a concert. I have been to The Phantom of the Opera during its extended run in San Francisco a few years ago, and it was just incredible.



5. What are your thoughts on downloading free music online vs. purchasing albums? Do you feel the RIAA is right in its pursuit to stop people from dowloading free music?Well, I think this is not necessarily the artists talking. It's the recording industry, and they do have a lot to lose if people don't buy CDs. But I see them as a middle-man with a foot on the neck of the public, exploiting artists. If I were a famous artist right now, I'd cut my ties with the recording industry, offer my music for free or really cheap online, and give really awesome concerts that drew large crowds.

One possible solution as I see it would be for the artists to arrange to have pay-per-song downloading. This way you could get a CD you liked for $15, instead of one that has two songs you like and a dozen songs you're ambivalent about. I think that problem is the reason for a lot of the downloading that goes on -- I know it's been mine at times.

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